Believe

     One of the things that my coworkers like to tease me about(mostly good-naturedly) is my love for music. In particular, for my love of certain artists. . . ie, Taylor Swift. You know, the shaking it off, never getting back together, crying on her guitar Taylor Swift.

  

     Apparently, it isn't cool to actually think 90% of her songs are pretty good. Well, you know me, never doing the "it" thing. But it got me thinking as to why I like her songs. Why do I keep listening to her cd's over and over?

     And this is what I've decided. I appreciate her music because she believes. In the music industry today, there's so much that has given up on dreaming and hope and searching for the beauty of the world.

     Here's a couple quick examples, "I just wanna use your love/ Tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight/ I don't wanna lose your love tonight." So sings Katy Perry right after she talks about how her boyfriend is out of town for a while.

     "Oh, I hope you know you gotta go/ Yo, get up and go, I don't wanna know/ How or why you're gross, you gotta go/ Yo, get up and go 'cause I don't wanna know." Thus sings Ke$ha after her latest fling decided to "Kiss and Tell".

     Now, don't get me wrong. I really do enjoy both of those singers. But I don't at all appreciate their songs in the same manner. Because what intrigues me about her singing is that she never gives up on her dreams. And not the get all the women, cars, and money that you want sort of dream.

     Even in her break up songs (and yes, I realize there's a Titanic-sized boatload of them), she hasn't stopped believing that there's true love out there. She still believes in fairy tales, she still believes in the white horse, she still believes that her prince will find her someday.

     And that's the reason that I love her music. Because I believe too. I believe in true love. I believe that romance isn't completely dead. And I'll keep believing, and keep listening. Because why would I want to ever stop believing?

     One of the things that my coworkers like to tease me about(mostly good-naturedly) is my love for music. In particular, for my love of certain artists. . . ie, Taylor Swift. You know, the shaking it off, never getting back together, crying on her guitar Taylor Swift.

  

     Apparently, it isn't cool to actually think 90% of her songs are pretty good. Well, you know me, never doing the "it" thing. But it got me thinking as to why I like her songs. Why do I keep listening to her cd's over and over?

     And this is what I've decided. I appreciate her music because she believes. In the music industry today, there's so much that has given up on dreaming and hope and searching for the beauty of the world.

     Here's a couple quick examples, "I just wanna use your love/ Tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight, tonight/ I don't wanna lose your love tonight." So sings Katy Perry right after she talks about how her boyfriend is out of town for a while.

     "Oh, I hope you know you gotta go/ Yo, get up and go, I don't wanna know/ How or why you're gross, you gotta go/ Yo, get up and go 'cause I don't wanna know." Thus sings Ke$ha after her latest fling decided to "Kiss and Tell".

     Now, don't get me wrong. I really do enjoy both of those singers. But I don't at all appreciate their songs in the same manner. Because what intrigues me about her singing is that she never gives up on her dreams. And not the get all the women, cars, and money that you want sort of dream.

     Even in her break up songs(and yes, I realize there's a Titanic-sized boatload of them), she hasn't stopped believing that there's true love out there. She still believes in fairy tales, she still believes in the white horse, she still believes that her prince will find her someday.

     And that's the reason that I love her music. Because I believe too. I believe in true love. I believe that romance isn't completely dead. And I'll keep believing, and keep listening. Because why would I want to ever stop believing?

If you could only have ten. . .

So here's the long version of my facebook list.
Basically, the idea is to list the ten books that have been most influential in your life. As a former speech and debate competitor, a list was not really enough for me, so I wrote a blog post. :-) Instead of a list, I made a list with the reason(s) why that book was chosen.
So, without further ado:

1: The Bible, by the Author of the Universe. No explanation really needed, but really now. If God had written any other book, it would be on this list as well.

(The rest of these are in no particular order)

2: Inkheart, by Cornelia Funke. This book was probably one of the first "young adult" books I ever read. I love the emphasis on imagination, but the way she doesn't sugarcoat everything about life. Dustfinger is just about the loveliest tragic character ever written.

3: The Water Mirror, by Kai Meyer. This series is hauntingly beautiful. Mermaids, living stone lions, Lots of Venice :) It's just lovely all around.

4: Not Even a Hint, by Joshua Harris. I borrowed this book from my sister Faith at my birthday in January. Since then, I have read it 3 times through, several times going back through parts. If you don't like his other books(can't really blame you, honestly), this one is still worth it.

5: A Single Shard, by Linda Sue Park. This lovely little book is probably the best elementary children's book I've ever read(sorry CS Lewis). I really recommend all of her work, but this one's the best. I wish the character's dedication to quality inspired me more than it has so far.

6: Finnikin of the Rock, by Mellina Marchetta. This book. I don't even know where to start. The whole series is so deep. Not as in, Screwtape Letters, but as in really exploring hard issues. Slavery, politics, courage, character and virtue, and really focusing on what true love is. It is not an easy series to get through though. A lot of disturbing violence and some sexual themes. It definitely has left an impact though.

7: The Golden Compass, by Philip Pullman. I feel like this book gets a bad rap because of the author's views on religion. Which. . .  has to be taken into account, but if you found a different word to use instead of church like he does, there's nothing really wrong with it. (The church in his book is basically a government.) This one(and the series) is really about finding your place in the world, and accepting that what you want doesn't always work out.

8: Love You Forever, by Robert Munsch. This is a children's picture book. It makes me cry. I am completely unashamed. 

9: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, by JK Rowling. The whole series has to be included. I don't know if the author is a Christian, but she has a very Christian outlook on death and grief. Lots of good quotes from the books. Lots of good examples of sacrificial love, emphasis on character. Just good books.

10: Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, by Philip K Dick. I like this title a lot actually. The whole book talks about what it is to be human. Hard thoughts after reading it. It inspired the movie Blade Runner. I don't recommend that unless you just love Harrison Ford. Otherwise not worth it. But the book is good.

So there's my 10. If you want more details or my opinions in greater depth, I'd be happy to give them. Ask and ye shall receive.

Monsters

Is there a monster in your closet?

There isn’t one in mine.

My closet is completely stuffed with dress shirts and my brothers’ boxes of assorted junk. Seriously, there’s not even room for a skeleton.

In complete honesty though, I don’t have a single skeleton in my closet. The thing about skeletons is that the ones in closets don’t scare me. The ones that scare me are the ones inside me. I’m not sure how they all fit, but they never leave me.

The important thing about skeletons, I think though, is that everyone has them. We’re all walking around with our hidden doubts, buried regrets, and secret pasts. It’s easy to focus on our own past and forget about the struggles of others. & the major part of all this is that they’re hidden. We don’t know when other people are having rough days, when nothing’s going right, and everything in life seems to be going wrong. I’ve had those days, more than I like or would care to admit.

               

                It’s hard for me to remember though, that other people have their bad days too. I’m often not gracious to my family or the people in my drive thru, when they’re not exactly on the ball. (Trust me, you don’t want to know what we say about you guys over the headset sometimes.) I guess for me right now, the primary application for me right now, is to be more gracious and Christ-like. Imagine that as an application. How unexpected. Secondarily, and perhaps even more spiritually applicable, don’t judge on outward appearance, but get to know people. Persons are awesome, but they’re not perfect.

"For the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart."

Gates and Houses

In my Bible Study, we’ve been in Genesis 28, talking about Jacob and the meaning of “Bethel”. What it means to Jacob, what it really is, etc, etc, etc. . . What does it mean that Jacob saw a stairway to Heaven? What does it mean that he named the place Bethel, or House of God. All quite lovely, possibly meaningful questions.

But some things intrigue me even more than these previous questions. My mind went down the rabbit hole and I started thinking about the phrase ‘el’ meaning God. And so I wondered, what in the world does Babel mean? Since it clearly had some meaning beyond the now common “nonsense”.

So then, this handy thing called an online dictionary ;) tells me that the word Babel means the “Gate of God”. We conclude from this what then?

I’m not actually a theologian, and I have absolutely no idea. Zilch. None. Nada. Zip. As in literally, I got nothing.

But I did have a few thoughts ;)

Beginning with this one. Isn’t it intriguing that God’s blessing was given at Bethel, the House of God, where God revealed himself to a human? While, at the same time, the biggest failure in history was when at Babel, the Gate of God, man attempted to open the gates of Heaven themselves? Yup, it’s intriguing.

And I actually just had that one thought, so have a nice night everybody.

The Weight of Glory

I despise my awards. 

     Don't get me wrong. I love winning, I've had a lot of great tournaments, and I really enjoy competing. I have 17 shiny plaques hanging on my wall, or sitting on my shelf, and I cannot bear to appreciate them.
     Most people would probably say that they represent how well I've done and that I should be happy to have them. And yet to me, they mean nothing. Their only value lies in the memories of partners and fun that I had in the past.

I do not deserve these awards that I have been given. I find no comfort in my achievements.

     It is despicable to me, the way that I have won them. There are so many fellow competitors who put forth the time and the effort to win their events. There have been so many hours put forth in practice and in preparation, so much growth, and so much work. And they are not recognized.

     I competed in three speech events, and total, I put in less that ten hours of work. I won first place in two of them, and was in finals for the last. And I deserved not a one.

     To those people who have worked for hours and years to get their awards, who have put in the work to receive this recognition of excellence, these plaques represent growth and perseverance.

     But to me, they are indicative only of my desire, my hunger for glory, my lust for recognition. To me, they are a golden crown, weighing me down as I tread water as I grab more treasure.

For there is a weight to glory that no man can bear, no mortal can endure

One song that has really made me think goes like this:

Turn you eyes upon Jesus

Look full in His wonderful face

And the things of earth will grow strangely dim

In the light of His glory and grace

I am no wise man, the words of this song often ring upon deaf ears. But if we pursue excellence over accolades, Christ over charisma, righteousness over recognition, then we no longer have to burdened.

Jerks

Recently, a coworker of mine asked me a question that I really wasn't sure how to answer. To be honest, I wasn't sure I wanted to answer it anyway. It was a pretty loaded question, even though I was aware of the context. 

             "Why are guys always jerks?" (Not that exact noun, but good enough for this purpose.)

I really wasn't sure what to say. I basically mumbled some non-answer to the rhetorical question and we left it at that. But as is the case with many things, it didn't get left like that in my mind. I've been thinking about it ever since, and I've come up with at least something of an answer. 

          Guys are naturally jerks(being humans and all :P ), and nowadays most don't grow out of it. Nobody's teaching them how to be gentlemen. Which of course made me think about what defines a gentlemen from a jerk. Because let's be honest, I can open every door every time for every girl and still be a jerk. But what I've concluded sets apart the gentlemen from the jerks is respect.

          A true gentlemen will be respectful not just to "their" girl, but to all women. Which is a lot higher of a standard than holding doors and getting coats, and  rightly so. To achieve their potential, we need to be held to high standards. And being respectful is crucial part of those standards. Think of the way that women are objectified by our culture. Showing even minimal respect will be a real difference from the majority. And not just as gentlemen, but also as Christians, we should be looking to stand in character and virtue above the general population. 

          And in the area of relationships, it's also pretty important. This quote pretty much sums it up.

          “This generation has lost the true meaning of romance. There are so many songs that disrespect women. You can’t treat the woman you love as a piece of meat. You should treat your love like a princess. Give her love songs, something with real meaning. Maybe I’m old fashioned but to respect the woman you love should be a priority.”         

 ~ Tom Hiddleston